[BE THE AIMLESS DOUCHEBAG.]

[pincerattack]

[You've been wandering for awhile! The Plains of Spite are indeed full of spite, in that you keep tripping in holes in the ground and almost landing right on your face. It's a good place to wander around, though, and to practice with your sickles a little. ...possibly also to yell at the sky because you hate everything, but then the big animal somebody said is called an alot of crankiness had made a weird noise right back in your face and gone back to chewing on grass.

Anybody out on the plains probably sees you standing there! Your sickles are not captchalogued because that alot looks really sketchy and you might need them on short notice, but you're not actively practicing right now.]

Comments

[cavedwellers]

GGRRRRRRNNNNGT.

[pincerattack]

[side-eye the thing]

WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM, ALOTBEAST?

[cavedwellers]

[paw irritably at grass, which is not as green as that in other pastures]

NRRRGN.

[pincerattack]

SERIOUSLY, HOW THE FUCK HAVE I EGREGIOUSLY OFFENDED YOU

UNLESS JUST ME EXISTING HAS DONE THAT! WHICH OKAY, FAIR ENOUGH!

[you grip your sickles a little harder, just in case]

[cavedwellers]

RRNT RRNT RRNT!

[this grass is unacceptable and there are trip-holes everywhere and now there is an angry two-legs!]

[pincerattack]

[this grass is totally fucking unacceptable, it's true]

WHAT, DO YOU WANT TO STRIFE?

BECAUSE I'M WARNING YOU, I GET SERIOUS WHEN RANDOM FAUNA DECIDES TO AGGRESS AT ME.

[cavedwellers]

NNRRRRRRRGGGGHN!

[being yelled at is even more cranky-making than this stupid plain!]

[pincerattack]

[oh, it's on now! claws up, grubfucker, it's on.

this shitty strife doesn't have a snazzy theme song, of course, but if it did this would be it. this is like strifing with your crabdad all over again.]

[cavedwellers]

>AGGRESS
 ABSTAIN
 ABJURE
 ABSCOND

RRRRRRRNT!

[lumbering charge!]

[pincerattack]

[youth roll! you take no damage! now it's your turn to charge in.]

[cavedwellers]

 AGGRESS
>ABSTAIN
 ABJURE
 ABSCOND

[???]

[pincerattack]

[okay, this is totally fucking embarrassing but you don't care, nobody's here but the alot and the bucketwitch anyway. you are totally going to jump on this thing's back. because it is the kind of ridiculous video game move you can get behind.]

[cavedwellers]

[MASH Δ to activate special move GET UP ON THE ALOT'S BACK]

[onlyhonournow]

[wow]

[reaching a hand out]

[cavedwellers]

GRRRRRN!

[hopping awkwardly up and down, that's a gesture that communicates clearly]

[onlyhonournow]

[um]

[kneels?]

[cavedwellers]

NRRRRRRG.

[???]

[onlyhonournow]

[.......chin scritches?]

[cavedwellers]

GNN GNN RRRRNNN!

[whoa there mister this is a first date]

[onlyhonournow]

[shrinking back, concerned]

Oh. I'm... sorry?

[cavedwellers]

NNRRRRRRR.

[alot of smugness]

[onlyhonournow]

Um.

Are you hungry?

[cavedwellers]

RRRRGNNNNNNN.

[ |X ]

[onlyhonournow]

[... backing up slowly ;;]

I apologise for disturbing you.

[BOWING. yep.]

[oneeyedfish]

[Hands in your pockets, you can't help but stop and observe the situation -- from a safe distance. Mainly, you're wondering if the alot might happen to be the local god. You're about due for finding one in this place.]

[It's sort of god-shaped. Isn't it?]