OMG VD!

[cavedwellers]

[Gosh you guys, there must be a holiday on! One of the bigger, more well-lit caves has been decked out for a PARTY, with heart-shaped BALLOONS and also red and white STREAMERS decking the stalactites and shit. There are BUCKETS filled with LITTLE CANDY HEARTS, and there is a FOUNTAIN featuring a rosy-cheeked CUPID who is PEEING PINK LEMONADE into a basin. Also ther are CUPS in case you couldn't tell the LEMONADE was for DRINKING.

Also, everything is HEAVILY SPIKED WITH APHRODISIACS. Eating or drinking the party favors will make you want to MAKE OUT with anyone who gets IN STRIKING DISTANCE. Have fun with that!]

Comments

[lifestudies]

[NOT getting up, because his tentacles are doing this squirming-and-gripping thing, this feels good and it needs to continue]

Why would you want to, ah, go looking for something stupid like that when -- nnh! -- it's getting this good?

[lifestudies]

[this kiss has a lot of biting in it, and a lot of tongue sparring, and -- oh, wait, breasts seem to be a big deal for a lot of people, don't they? shoving his free hand up under her shirt to tweak a nipple]

[ice_and_steel]

I've never known a world without war. I don't even know what you would do to end it.

[onlyhonournow]

[hologram smiles again, a little wistfully]

I'm not so sure myself.

[ice_and_steel]

nnn--

[she nips at his shoulder and shifts a little more and then bites a little harder than she actually meant to when that turns out to be really awesome. and--oh, like that--]

[ice_and_steel]

It seems like there will always be people who want to abuse their power, so others must know how to fight, if only to stop them from going too far.

Unless that's just a self-serving excuse because I don't know what else to do with myself besides command armies.

[lifestudies]

aah, yes -- good --

[faster, and harder, and the way she moves when he toys with that nipple is very rewarding, so twisting it a bit harder]

[onlyhonournow]

... No. You're right.

Not everyone wants the same thing. That's not necessarily bad, but it can be. But I want to believe that there's a way--a compromise. A way that doesn't require any more sacrifices.

[pincerattack]

It's not stupid, you culturally insensitive excuse for a semi-sentient being. ALSO I ALREADY EXPLAINED THAT PART. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU THINK GENETIC MATERIAL MEANT.

[you lick the blood off your lip and glare at him as well as someone in your position can, which is admittedly not very intimidating as glares go. you think maybe you were premature in thinking you needed a bucket right this minute, but you're going to need one. if this culturally-deficient human doesn't give you the chance to get one, it's going to be-- oh fuck, you can't decide whether that's terrifying or amazing.]

[lifestudies]

[reaching up to put a hand over his mouth -- the gloves will take the worst of the inevitable bite, won't they?]

Stop yelling! It feels good, doesn't it? Stop trying to be difficult!

You like this, don't you?

[and this is a twist and press with the fingers inside him]

[pincerattack]

[you try to say I NEED A BUCKET, UNLIKE YOU I AM NOT SO KINKY I'M TRYING EVERYTHING I'VE NEVER SEEN IN PORN BEFORE, but it comes out more of a MMMMPH ARGH MMMMMMMMMPGH against his hand. you get the brilliant idea to just get the damn bucket yourself, you've got teeth and claws and this human doesn't and there's no reason you shouldn't win, but just as you push your hips up to get some leverage he's twisting his fingers down. the combined movement hits something that makes you almost come apart right then and there; you're right there on the edge, one good stroke away coming whether you've got a bucket or not, so close you don't even care about a bucket anymore.

instead of waiting for him, you push up against his fingers again so they hit the same spot. and that's it; you can feel your smaller fronds reflexively tightening around him, and you bite his hand and come.]

[lifestudies]

[suddenly everything is wet -- wet and RED.

hold up right there.]

--Are you bleeding?

[pincerattack]

[breathe, you stupid wriggler, remember how to breathe. which is hard, because his hand is still there and so is his weird excuse for a bulge. but you manage!]

Are you stupid? Of course I'm not fucking bleeding! I warned you about the bucket.

[it's hard to sound angry when you've just had a ridiculously good orgasm, even when you're Captain Shoutmaster of the First Regiment of Extremely Loud Motherfuckers.]

[lifestudies]

--haha, you must be fine, if you can still sound that cranky.

[rocking hips into the suddenly-much-looser grip of those tentacles]

The way you were squeezing before, do that again.

[pincerattack]

[cranky? cranky? this is the most chill you've sounded in a long, long time! who does this guy expect you to be, Gamzee? whomever he expects you to be, he's still demanding as fuck, isn't he? still, it's probably polite to return the favor-- especially since you feel a lot less like a gelatinous food product made from the hooves of hoofbeasts than you probably should, which you're blaming on that stupid drug-laced candy that started this whole mess. so you oblige him and tighten up, and start stroking him with your fronds again.]

[lifestudies]

aaahn -- yes --

[there, oh, yes, that's good, that's wonderful, sloppy and wet now and just the right amount of pressure, hips rocking into it, eyes squeezed shut -- hissing through clenched teeth and trying not to make too much noise and coming, shuddering on top of him.]

[sei_what]

Okay. So.

It's not like anyone who gives a damn is here, is it? This place is...a different sort of place, where people do different sorts of things. People bathe unwittingly in giant vaginas. It's that sort of place.

Also, it is spring.

Sort of.

...okay so it's spring in her nagabakama at least and she just figures hell with it, she plucks the fattest juiciest-looking orange out of the bowl in both hands and makes her absolute best Significant Eyebrows at the fine metal gentleman over it.

AND THEN SHE JUST BITES RIGHT INTO THAT MOTHERFUCKER, PEEL AND ALL

juice runs down her arms, up her sleeves, SHE IS A GODDAMNED BARBARIAN AND GIVES NO FUCKS

A BARBARIAN WITH NEEDS

please please let him get the hint, she thinks, or she'll have to wash all these robes herself and still not get any

[wingedjustice]

It matters to me.

[prankster_gambit]

[you make a high whining sound deep in your throat and rest your forehead against his shoulder, hands squeezing against his bulge, watching his hand curling around your dick. His skin feels different from yours, rougher, and that definitely pings some awesome feelings!]

[bythehorns]

[this is pretty much the most amazing thing you've ever felt, and you're pretty sure he likes it, too, which makes it even better. you nuzzle his hair and this rumbly little purr bubbles up in your throat without you even meaning to do it, and you stroke him a little more confidently]

[pincerattack]

[wait, it feels like something happened, but it must not have if there's no genetic material everywhere? you hope that's it, anyway, because your bulge is starting to loosen its grip on him and retract regardless. it doesn't go back completely, because those fingers are still inside of you and they're distracting, fuck, but it does let him go.]

...is that it?

[lifestudies]

[this would probably be a good time to pull out, wouldn't it? and roll off to the side instead of collapsing on top of him, because he'd yell and probably bite]

You are so terrible.

[but having just come makes everything feel pleasant, so there's no heat at all in those words]

[pincerattack]

[watch the claws, YOU DO NOT FUCKING SCRATCH THE HUMAN, KARKAT. at least, not this human at this particular moment, because you were pretty okay with clawing up that other human and maybe in another context it would be okay to scratch John. just not right now, you've wreaked enough carnage on the human race for today. he did seem to like that spot, though, so you go back there carefully, with only the pad of your finger and not the claw.]

[pincerattack]

I'm terrible?

[you finally figure out where his genetic material is, which is to say it's on you. it's actually the weirdest, weirdest thing about this entire encounter, because does it really count-- and ugh, you aren't even thinking about the fact that you need to clean up your own mess because there were absolutely no buckets involved in that and past Karkat was a stupid, kinky little idiot-- if there's so little of it you have to look to find it?]

I don't even understand how your species hasn't died out yet, because everything about your reproduction is stupid and illogical.

[lifestudies]

We're not the ones who apparently need some sort of ritual sperm-harvesting apparatus. It sounds to me like you make the process needlessly complicated.