This is definitely not LOWAS

[prankster_gambit]

[In a particularly nasty part of the already generally unpleasant cave, John Egbert descends, catching himself before he takes a nasty fall. This place sure doesn't look familiar but that's okay. Nothing has looked familiar in a while! Instead of climbing down the steep decline, John floats down because gosh, floating is awesome; he's pretty that if floating were a thing people could just do, shoes would be totally obsolete.

Landing at the bottom of whatever makes up caves - biology is his thing, not geology! - John looks around.]

Hello?

Comments

[faygoandpie]

[welp Karkat's yelling something motherfucking fierce and Tavbro is looking a little panicked.]

What the fuck is the ruckus all up in here, my motherfucking brothers?

[bythehorns]

Oh, Gamzee, uh --

Tell Karkat, how scary, he is, because, he doesn't believe me, when I tell him.

[faygoandpie]

Hell yeah, Karkat's scary! He's the scariest motherfucker all up in this bitch and the only reason why I ain't running in fear when I hear him coming is because he's my motherfucking bro and I ain't even got to worry about it.

[you tilt your head to one side because there's something that just isn't right about this whole motherfucking setup but you can't put your prong on it.]

[bythehorns]

There, uh, see, that is, what I wanted to say, but, you make it, sound lots better.

[pincerattack]

[facepalm]

What am I going to do, yell someone to death? Terrorize them over Trollian until they drop? Snap and shove them into one of those stupid treasure chests they like so much?

[bythehorns]

[??????]

I thought, uh, you were, pretty good, with those sickles, weren't you?

[pincerattack]

You mean the sickles I put in a fetch modus I can't even open without half an hour and a reference book.

[you are so done with this at this point you're not even defending your programming skills at this point. stupid hacker fetch modus. why did you ever think that was a good idea? oh, right, because Sollux told you it was a bad fucking idea and you had to prove him wrong!]

[bythehorns]

...I think, um, maybe, I should just, not talk anymore, since, it seems like, I just keep making it worse. Um. Sorry.

[pincerattack]

FOR FUCK'S SAKE, STOP ACTING LIKE I JUST KILLED ONE OF YOUR FIDUSPAWN.

1/2

[bythehorns]

D:

2/2

[bythehorns]

Y-you know, maybe, that would, be easier, if y-you didn't yell at me, every time, I tried, to be nice to you.

Re: 2/2

[pincerattack]

[see, that's more like it!]

See, was that so hard?

[bythehorns]

Y-you don't want me, to answer that, with the truth.

[it is really hard to put your hands someplace where he can't see them shaking]

[pincerattack]

[it's ok, your shakes earlier definitely weren't rage!]

I... look. You're way braver than I am about a lot of things that are important, okay?

[bythehorns]

I-I am, not so sure, about that, but also, I really don't want to have, more yelling.

[faygoandpie]

[gogdamn, your motherfucking Tavbro is shaking like when you up and dropped one of your faygos. You take his hands and close them up in yours, like a little flutterbeast closing it's wings all up on around itself.]

You alright, little bro?

[bythehorns]

[oh. that does feel nice. and Gamzee is pretty much never mad at you, even though you are a failure at almost everything.]

I-I think so, it's just, it's really hard, to be brave, sometimes.

[faygoandpie]

[your pump biscuit just can't motherfucking handle him sometimes]

When it gets too hard, brother, you just come on over. I'll be happy to take care of you.

[bythehorns]

That, um, that sounds, really nice.

[you scooch closer and lean into Gamzee for a hug, really more like just leaning on him than anything. he's so nice to you.]

[faygoandpie]

I dunno, bro, I bet motherfuckers can be scared to death and your voice is all up and fucking terrifying.

[gogdamn, you are a motherfucking awesome moirail]

[pincerattack]

[...okay, you can almost give him that one. almost!]

Uh. Okay. I guess that could work.

[faygoandpie]

Fuck yeah, bro.

[he's looking pretty damn stressed the fuck out and you reached out and pap him]

[pincerattack]

[it does feel nice to get papped right now! but it's kind of your fault that Tavros is upset right now, too, and you did hog all of Gamzee's attention yesterday with your stupid arrival and your stupid tantrum about it.]

You should probably go and have, you know. Matesprit time. I'll be okay by myself.

[faygoandpie]

Motherfucker, you are all up and right about that.

[you give him one more pap]

[pincerattack]

[and that is your cue to abscond from this scene and worry about your John problems, because Gamzee doesn't need his moirail hanging over his shoulder during matesprit time.]