This is definitely not LOWAS

[prankster_gambit]

[In a particularly nasty part of the already generally unpleasant cave, John Egbert descends, catching himself before he takes a nasty fall. This place sure doesn't look familiar but that's okay. Nothing has looked familiar in a while! Instead of climbing down the steep decline, John floats down because gosh, floating is awesome; he's pretty that if floating were a thing people could just do, shoes would be totally obsolete.

Landing at the bottom of whatever makes up caves - biology is his thing, not geology! - John looks around.]

Hello?

Comments

[prankster_gambit]

[you fiddle with your godtier hood, nervously play with the tip of it.]

But. I do pity you Karkat and i know that's really rude so I won't say it again but-

[wait. You vaguely remember what he said about trolls and how they have hate and pity and how pity is basically like love and-

you flush bright red and kind of gawk at him because does that mean that he's started pitying you now, instead of hating you? And you just told him you pity him! Twice!...and you're not sure you want to take it back! You turtle back in your hoodie to hide your face and gosh, you sure are glad it's so big!]

Uhm, okay. I'm sor- I mean. Okay.

[what does this meeaaan?]

[bythehorns]

[??????]

I thought, uh, you were, pretty good, with those sickles, weren't you?

[faygoandpie]

I dunno, bro, I bet motherfuckers can be scared to death and your voice is all up and fucking terrifying.

[gogdamn, you are a motherfucking awesome moirail]

[pincerattack]

[AGREED, WHAT THE FUCK DOES THIS EVEN MEAN.]

[you pretty much just have your face in your hands at this point, because oh gog your whole face must be bright red and yeah, you seem to have screamed to the entire universe that you're a mutant but there's no need to advertise what color your stupid mutant blood is.]

Just... what part are you even saying okay to?

[you're guessing it's 'okay, I'll shut up,' but, well, he does keep saying really determined things like BUT I DO PITY YOU and oh gog it's like you're in a movie and this is stupid but also pretty much the culmination of every unrealistic flushed-confession scenario you could have possibly wanted from anyone. which is why it can't possibly be true and he's just saying that yes, he will shut up.]

[pincerattack]

You mean the sickles I put in a fetch modus I can't even open without half an hour and a reference book.

[you are so done with this at this point you're not even defending your programming skills at this point. stupid hacker fetch modus. why did you ever think that was a good idea? oh, right, because Sollux told you it was a bad fucking idea and you had to prove him wrong!]

[pincerattack]

[...okay, you can almost give him that one. almost!]

Uh. Okay. I guess that could work.

[bythehorns]

...I think, um, maybe, I should just, not talk anymore, since, it seems like, I just keep making it worse. Um. Sorry.

[pincerattack]

FOR FUCK'S SAKE, STOP ACTING LIKE I JUST KILLED ONE OF YOUR FIDUSPAWN.

[prankster_gambit]

[you chew on your bottom lip because you don't know and you don't want to be a huge jerk and get his hopes up again but you also aren't sure what you're feeling either and. Gosh. GOSH.]

I don't know what I'm saying okay to!

[well, that's just going to make him mad! Again!]

I mean, uh, I guess I'm not saying I will shut up because, haha, I don't know how to shut up, everyone's always told me I sure do like to babble a lot and...

[oh god. this is really awkward and you slap your hands over your face, in your hood]

Uh, anyways, I will totally think about what I say before I say it and I'm sorry for being so dumb about all this!

1/2

[bythehorns]

D:

2/2

[bythehorns]

Y-you know, maybe, that would, be easier, if y-you didn't yell at me, every time, I tried, to be nice to you.

[faygoandpie]

Fuck yeah, bro.

[he's looking pretty damn stressed the fuck out and you reached out and pap him]

Re: 2/2

[pincerattack]

[see, that's more like it!]

See, was that so hard?

[bythehorns]

Y-you don't want me, to answer that, with the truth.

[it is really hard to put your hands someplace where he can't see them shaking]

[pincerattack]

[it's ok, your shakes earlier definitely weren't rage!]

I... look. You're way braver than I am about a lot of things that are important, okay?

[bythehorns]

I-I am, not so sure, about that, but also, I really don't want to have, more yelling.

[pincerattack]

[yeah, he's just going to-- WAIT, WHAT. SERIOUSLY, WHAT. either he's intentionally skirting the question to avoid the subject, he's pranking you, or he meant to say he will not shut up in the way the question was framed.

OH GOG. OH JEGUS. YOU DON'T EVEN WANT TO KNOW WHICH ONE IT IS RIGHT NOW.

...you peek out from between your fingers anyway! because maybe you can tell from his face if he's being sincere or not! except you can't, because he's making the exact same gesture you are under his hood. you aren't up to talking right now, though. nope. not until you've figured out if you're being had or not.]

[pincerattack]

[it does feel nice to get papped right now! but it's kind of your fault that Tavros is upset right now, too, and you did hog all of Gamzee's attention yesterday with your stupid arrival and your stupid tantrum about it.]

You should probably go and have, you know. Matesprit time. I'll be okay by myself.

[prankster_gambit]

[oh jeez, Karkat's not saying anything and that's just. bad. You tilt your head and look at him from around your hoodie and he's-

he's peeking at you! Despite the situation, you grin because gosh, that sure is...something, anyway.]

Uh. I guess I'm saying okay to both the shutting up about things I don't understand and the, you know. The pity thing too.

[faygoandpie]

Motherfucker, you are all up and right about that.

[you give him one more pap]

[faygoandpie]

[gogdamn, your motherfucking Tavbro is shaking like when you up and dropped one of your faygos. You take his hands and close them up in yours, like a little flutterbeast closing it's wings all up on around itself.]

You alright, little bro?

[bythehorns]

[oh. that does feel nice. and Gamzee is pretty much never mad at you, even though you are a failure at almost everything.]

I-I think so, it's just, it's really hard, to be brave, sometimes.

[pincerattack]

[and that is your cue to abscond from this scene and worry about your John problems, because Gamzee doesn't need his moirail hanging over his shoulder during matesprit time.]

[faygoandpie]

[your pump biscuit just can't motherfucking handle him sometimes]

When it gets too hard, brother, you just come on over. I'll be happy to take care of you.

[pincerattack]

[and now he is looking and it doesn't look like he's pranking you! and he SAID YES ABOUT BOTH and he probably doesn't know what he's talking about, still, and it's the most pitiful thing you've ever seen.

... <333333333]

B-both?

[oh, of course your voice would come out weird and squeaky! IT JUST FIGURES. you sort of inch towards him, though, sideways sort of like a crab. because, well, nervousness calls back childhood habits you picked up from your lusus! until you're close enough you can see his stupid teeth and his stupid highblood eyes up close and fuck you're going to regret this: you hug him.]